top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]swingit 1017 points1018 points  (103 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I went to middle school and some of high school with Ione James. From what I remember her family had a lot of money and she had a real stick up her ass. She wasn't popular, she hung out mostly with the same couple of girls. The biggest story I really remember involving her wasn't even about her, but her friend Dani who got pregnant in sophomore year, that was a big gossip source for a bunch of bored teenagers. Other than that she was pretty into drama and our middle school (Brentwood) put on musicals in the spring and she was always trying to be involved if not starring in them even though she couldn't carry a tune to save her life. Surprising no one, she screeched all the way through those productions. She'd bring her guitar to school sometimes but I never knew if she had a reason for it, just that she looked like an idiot carrying it around. She joined drama club in high school, I guess she wanted to badly sing through showtunes some more. Then she told everyone she got a songwriting deal and was gonna become real famous and nobody believed her cuz we'd all heard her sing already so we figured we knew that was heading nowhere. Now I have to hear her singing all the damn time. Makes me feel like Clarice when Hannibal asks her if she can still hear the lambs screaming. I can still hear Ione screaming...every time I get in the car.

[–]DoggDays 236 points537 points  (9 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I'm enjoying imagining Ione as every asshole with an acoustic guitar in high school:

"Danny Irkson?"

"Here"

"Jett Jackson?"

"Here"

"Ione James?"

"anyway HERE's wonderwall"

[–]freetheworld 28 points279 points  (8 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I'd bet Gold she performed that at at least one talent show

[–]slappyface 280 points281 points  (6 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Good to know I would have hated Ione as much in high school as I do now.

[–]ofliceandmen 103 points404 points  (1 child)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I got a blank plate baby and I'll eat your brain.

[–]Tornadope 1349 points1150 points  (48 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I went to high school with Ana King. Her name was Anastasie Schratter-Colvin here so everyone called her Annie and I don't think she liked it much. Mostly she just kept to herself because a lot of people picked on her for being Matilda and then for that really shitty kids movie she did right before we graduated. I remember there was this group of girls who would just kick the shit out of her and then joke about how she should just move them away with her mind. Right before we graduated she socked one of them in the face and then literally ran away to LA and then got all famous and shit and I'm pretty sure the girl who got punched is on crack now so I guess she won in the end. Her parents were notorious about covering shit up for her, like one year she got really high and crashed a car at a football game and no one ever heard about it again like it never happened. Nice enough girl, she just spent most of her time reading and looking like she'd rather be anywhere else. She was fucking hot though, like especially to my teenage self, if I had known how hot she'd be now I'd have kept her number or added her on Facebook or something. Oh, and one time she offered me a flask in History class but it turned out it just had Hawaiian Punch in it, which might be the weirdest thing she ever did actually. Like, what the fuck.

[–]buddhawreck 79 points80 points  (8 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I'm just imagining her in a leather jacket leaning on the outside of her school pretending to smoke rolled up lunchables bologna and taking hits from her Hawaiian Punch flask so please don't ruin this for me.

[–]trinkles 317 points318 points  (5 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

She might be on crack now but being punched by an Oscar winner is a pretty sick bragging right

[–]secondaryme 2059 points1006 points  (17 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

But did she crash it onto the field, OP we need more details here.

[–]spinelli 1457 points1458 points  (46 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I was a few years behind Oliver Cobb in HS. We weren't friends or anything but we did put on one drama production together. I was closer to his girlfriend as she was in all the plays/musicals and she was super sweet and probably the only reason he signed up at all. Oliver auditioned in their senior year when we did A Midsummer's Night Dream with a hilariously half-improvised doctor evil therapy monologue from Austin Powers. He was supposed to be Puck but he didn't show up to half of our rehearsals so our director ended up switching parts around so he was Snug. He was pretty funny/nice when he did show up but he mostly just stuck to hanging out with his girlfriend or the stage crew guys. I actually think he was around more once he was recast just because he could spend the time goofing off backstage which annoyed a few people in the cast but he gave me a slice of pizza once so I didn't care. Other than his monologue the only thing I can think of that would be interesting to share is when he spent one of our dress rehearsals taking notes to give everyone to improve their performances. Mine was to incorporate more of my character's tragic backstory into my performance - I was Cobweb. I had four lines. Apparently I had to work on better emoting the trials and tribulations of coming to terms with being bitten by a radioactive spider. I'm pretty sure he was high that day. He ended up dropping out of school with his girlfriend a little while later which I only knew about because she bailed on our musical to go try and become a famous singer. Was a weird surprise when Oliver was the one who ended up on television after that because she was definitely the more talented/driven one but I kind of wish I had saved those notes now.

[–]TomBurgundy 1855 points756 points  (24 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

As a fellow former drama nerd, I genuinely can't imagine how weird it must be for one of them to actually end up famous.

[–]spinelli 1473 points1474 points  (20 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Honestly every time I see him on tv or whatever I just get this weird realization of "this is the same kid that bragged about sneakily painting old timey swear words onto our set pieces and stuck french fries up his girlfriend's nose at our cast party?"

[–]Miss_Ery 40 points141 points  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I was hoping this story would end with him auditioning for your school's musical with Hooked on a Feeling.

[–]BAKINGIT 362 points363 points  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

ITT I learned mysteriously dropping out of high school always ends well.

[–]SwiggleSwoo 1544 points1545 points  (68 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

James Fornarola dropped out during our freshman year of high school. I didn't really know him but neither did anyone else. He was as quiet and weird as you'd expect and didn't have any friends. I don't mean he and the other nerds sat at their table alone during lunch while everyone else threw food at them, I mean he didn't have ANY friends. Even the nerds hated him. What I heard was some guy pushed him down the stairs and he broke his arm but the school wouldn't do anything about it and that's why he left. Anyway it looks like he's doing fine now.

[–]Blooddripps 66 points367 points  (11 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Considering he just got fired from the only thing that made him relevant, I don't know if "fine" is the word I'd use..

[–]Kickerz 65 points266 points  (9 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

[–]GoofTroupe 280 points281 points  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

This isn't really my story but it's the only one I have: My little sister took classes at the same dance studio as James Fornarola. She had a huge crush on him, but keep in mind that she was seven and thought she was in love with any guy over the age of nine who gave her the time of day. I met him a few times but honestly wouldn't have thought twice about him if she hadn't flipped out on me while we were watching Scott Pilgrim. From what I remember he was awkward and kind of shy but seemed pretty nice and didn't mind staying after class so my sister could show him the new Hello Kitty shoelaces she just learned to tie and let her borrow whatever book he was reading whenever she asked even though he had to know there was no way she was going to be reading Dostoevsky. They didn't have a ton of guys (no surprise) so the teachers all loved him and apparently there was a bloodbath to be assigned as his partner whenever recitals rolled around which I thought was stupid because he wasn't any cuter then than he is now, but when my sister and I went home last Christmas my parents had dug up some old home videos and he was actually really good, so I guess that was why. I wonder why he never made it to Broadway, since I keep hearing that's what he really wants to do.

[–]CheeseIsGod 698 points699 points  (55 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I basically spent all my early teenage years with Declan McAlarney (the guy who just won all those awards for playing that scientist in the wheelchair to answer the ‘who???’). We were both in the same school for fifth and sixth year in Dublin (the same ages as i believe second year of high school through graduation in the States - like 15-18 for reference). Anyway, i have to say i'm not sure i expected to say that I knew anyone who won Oscars and all that because I can remember him always being a pretty quiet kid. We had a couple of mutual friends so hung out when in the same circle at parties and stuff. I moved from outside the city so he knew a bunch of them longer than I did but I definitely have some old pictures from after school and whatnot with us both in them. He was always into acting then though too and had the lead in a couple of the school shows and even being involved in some city plays and stuff but never more than that. We went to different unis so we only saw each other a couple times on breaks, and still have some of the same friends. I've seen him once in awhile, couple times in Dublin when he's visiting his fam (including his mum who was my primary school teacher) and and I've never heard him bring up the fame thing at all or would even know he actually did anything with it to this level. I'm moving to London soon and I guess he heard through the grapevine about it and got in touch about what neighbourhood I'm looking in and stuff like that so that was cool of him.

[–]Oogly 420 points421 points  (42 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Declan McAlarney played wheelchair Jimmy??

[–]Hartfried 487 points488 points  (17 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

He wasn't in any of my classes but I lived in the same dorm as Ashton Campbell. I didn't know him too well but from what I saw he seemed funny, straight edge, really smart, and had a lot of girls hanging around him, but never did much with them. I don't know, from what I saw he seemed really socially awkward and the ladies never took the hint. I went to a few house parties he was at and he stood behind the booth most of the time. He would always tell everyone that he was going to write an off Broadway hip hop show and was going to marry Rosario Dawson but no one ever believed him. Around senior year he stopped going to parties and people were whispering that he was getting calls from some big people. When I saw him on Community I started wondering if he would eventually marry Rosario Dawson. Still holding out for that announcement.

[–]Sucubusss[🍰] 192 points193 points  (4 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Capone's off broadway hip hop show is everything I didn't know I needed.

[-]bobbleburger 1506 points1507 points  (81 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Went to high school with Adette Weiman for .5 seconds before she dropped out but for two weeks she was convinced my locker was someone else's and left some corny ass love notes for the dude. TWO WEEKS. Yeah, I probably should've told her sooner, but I really wanted to see how many cliches she could string together to form a paragraph. Spoiler alert: there is no limit. It's almost impressive. She's so cheesy I needed two bottles of cheap wine to read her notes.

[–]DJ_freeze 915 points916 points  (26 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

We're going to need scans of these notes immediately.

[–]melters 1027 points1028 points  (6 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

OP better deliver the cheese and it better be gouda.

[–]skoobysnacks 384 points985 points  (27 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I went to elementary and middle school with Spencer Darvey. I still can't believe this guy became an actor. How did that even happen?! He used think he could cure cancer, and now he's in The Hunger Games? What a joke. Spencer was absolutely INSUFFERABLE to everyone. He thought he was the smartest, never raised his hand before talking, laughed at anyone who got the wrong answer, and was basically satan. He purposely made other students feel stupid and inferior. There was one time when he made the biggest kid in our grade CRY for failing a test. He was a bully, but not in your typical "I'll take your lunch money" kind of way. I'm beyond amazed at how well he has the world convinced that he is just a "cute nerd". He plays it up for the media. And those glasses that he wears are 100% FAKE!!! You have no idea how many times he teased me for my glasses and bragged about his 20/20 vision. So don't fall for it!

[–]GingySnaps 345 points346 points  (21 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Did I just walk into the gym scene in Mean Girls? I think you're probably making him sound a lot worse than he actually was.

[–]WexNex 256 points257 points  (16 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Raise your hand if you've ever been personally victimized by Spencer Darvey's glasses.

[–]GingySnaps 179 points480 points  (8 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

He doesn't even go here!
- /u/skoobysnacks running into Spencer Darvey at the optometrist

[–]tacitocatito 2 points63 points  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I can't wait for him to fade into obscurity once THG is over. His whole "Look at me, I'm a nerd!" thing has gotten so old.

[–]funkechicken 382 points783 points  (27 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I went to high school with Spencer Seale, from You're the Worst, Don't Trust the B, The Social Network, etc. It was an arts boarding school and even though we were in the same grade, we had different majors (mine was visual art, hers was theater). We mostly only had academic classes together and not very many at that so we weren't very close. But she would still say hi to me and make small talk when she saw me around. She'd just ask about how my art projects were going or how my weekend was, but she always sounded genuinely interested, which was cool of her considering we weren't really friends. And she was really talented. I watched some productions she was in and it doesn't surprise me that she ended up in Hollywood. I wish I had better or more scandalous stories to tell about her, but she struck me as mostly normal. Hope that hasn't changed much.

[–]unpotenatially 346 points347 points  (21 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Is that her natural hair color? I've always wondered. That's the color I want.

[–]milkywayz 256 points257 points  (16 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Do you also want your pink shirt back?

[–]brobocop 183 points184 points  (8 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Don't look at me.

[–]funkechicken 5 points66 points  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Yeah, it is. I remember at the start of one year, I think either sophomore or junior year, she came back to school blonde. I thought she was new student for a second and got really confused when she started talking to me. But the blonde didn't last very long. She came back after Christmas break with it red again.

[–]warmandfuzzy 6 points127 points  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Spencer and I had mutual friends in college and I had pretty similar experiences when hanging out with her. She always talked to me like we were best friends. It was kinda weird sometimes because I was never really sure if she actually remembered me or knew who I was. She was at least always nice though.

[–]PotatoStorm 1 point72 points  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

The "mostly normal" part of this statement has only made me way too curious about the "slightly not normal" bits.

[–]BlindMouse 160 points813 points  (16 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

One of my good friends at university was in the same theatre group as Desmund Rowe when they were teens. They stayed in touch after he did the Harry Potter films and we all went out clubbing together a few times. He definitely liked to party hard, drank a lot and flirted up a storm with everyone, and he wasn't the best dancer in the world. Goofy and charming guy overall. We went for kebab at 3AM once after a night out and he stood in the middle of the street belting "Sweet Caroline" at the top of his lungs. I think he still talks to my friend on occasion.

[–]flatstanlee 3 points104 points  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

What I wood do to see Des terribly dancing oliver the (beater's) club.

[–]frumpygumps 1 point82 points  (4 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

had no idea this guy was in harry potter. i thought his claim to fame was because he dated (is dating?) ione james.

[–]Vipper 5 points206 points  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

HE WAS OLIVER WOOD, YOU MUGGLE!

[–]Curlyiain 5 points56 points  (2 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Actually he is on a TV show right now, Marvel's Agents of SHIELD. He has also been in some other films and TV stuff in the UK.

[–]Gryffinwhore 0 points81 point  (1 child)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Actually he's a keeper for Puddlemere United's reserve team.

[–]Curlyiain 0 points321 point  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Actually I think Ione James decided he wasn't a keeper.

[–]Tickle_Tock 0 points61 point  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

Oliver Wood drunk and hitting the dance floor is giving me the best mental image right now.

[–]ShockRock 58 points659 points  (4 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I went to middle school with Mava Szalinski (blogger/actress -- she's apparently going to be in the new DC comics movie) and it blows my mind every day that she's now kind of famous. Everybody knew she was going to fashion shows and doing movies back then because she'd be absent for weeks at a time, but nobody cared. She was easily the weirdest and most bullied person at our school, and I wondered all the time why she didn't just leave. She dressed like a homeless person and had really long hair that she dyed gray and combed over her face. She never talked to anyone, even the teachers, and she was always exempt from having to give presentations or read out loud. I went to school with her for three years and I literally never heard her speak once, so to see her in movies and on talk shows now is really jarring.

[–]Doctor_HU_ 19 points220 points  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I would have gladly taken the bullying if it got me out of giving presentations in school...

[–]hma 2 points103 points  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

at least now if she starts talking about being bullied in every interview like celebrities do we'll know it's legit for once.

[–]molly5eva 1 point92 points  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

TIL Mava Szakinski was IRL Allison from The Breakfast Club.

[–]FewGewdMen 1118 points519 points  (22 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I was at NYU the same time Althea Alden (Ophelia) was there. I didn't really know her that well but my friend was in the music program with her and everyone thought she was kind of weird? Oh and she had a nose ring back then. Always wondered why she doesn't now.

Definite know it all, my friend used to call her Hermoine Granger because she had to chime in with her opinion about everything and she'd get in really heated debates with anyone who disagreed with her outside of class and yeah, she was really uptight. She was also a lot younger than everyone else (we all assumed she skipped grades or something) so it didn't really help her make friends. Anyway, I guess she just needed to get laid or something because she eventually started dating this girl in the drama department and kind of did a 360? Like she started going out with everyone, pretty much stopped going to class and generally was a hell of a lot nicer? Definite typical lesbian codependentness happening. I saw her at a funeral of one of our mutual friends a few years back. She didn't really talk to anyone except for the ex who was also there, but I didn't really go over because it was obviously a weird situation.

[–]bullheather 408 points409 points  (5 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

TIL althea alden dated a girl which means i have a shot.

[–]hipstermister 285 points286 points  (2 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

TODAY you learned? i thought everyone knew this chick was into muff pie.

[–]katykats 172 points173 points  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

a college lesbian phase? oh yeah, she's soooo original.

[–]tednougat -1 points120 points  (1 child)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

is this the chick who went apeshit and stabbed a painting? she's hot. would watch.

[–]FalconsRule 0 points111 point  (0 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

maybe the painting was of a dick.

[–]NuWavve 374 points575 points  (47 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I was in the same form group as Claude Amick (a British musician.) I didn't know this until me and my friends saw her at Glastonbury last year. I remember her laying into a girl called Kelly in woodwork once by threatening her with a chisel and kids used to pick on her by calling her a lesbian, other than that she was forgettable.

[–]Sasaa 364 points165 points  (14 children)

sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

I'd let Claude threaten me with a chisel.

why are you reporting this?

reddit gold

In Summation

Want to say thanks to %(recipient)s for this comment? Give them a month of reddit gold.

  • make my gift anonymous
  • include a message

Please select a payment method.

Give gold often? Consider buying creddits to use, they're 40% cheaper if purchased in a set of 12.

Would you like to learn more about giving gold?